Nick Clegg – Profile of a Liar

Posted: September 22, 2012 in anarchy, controversy, politics
Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

Oh goodness me, Nick Clegg…  They do say that if you haven’t got anything nice to say, you shouldn’t say anything at all, but we really can’t keep our mouths shut about this guy, now can we.  So who is he actually?  Don’t worry if you don’t know, he is quite a hidden figure.  On paper, he is the Deputy Prime Minister of the United Kingdom.  In actual fact, however, he is just the Prime Minister’s sorry sidekick.  “Sorry” being an imperative word here, since he’s just publically apologised for one of his many, many lies.

Basically, what happened in the last general election, no single party had an overall majority.  So, the two other main parties, polar opposites Labour and Conservatives, started to fight for the attention of the Liberal Democrats.  Whoever they would side with would inevitably become the ruling party.  At that time, everybody was pretty disillusioned with Labour, but still, nobody could really believe that the Liberal Democrats could really ever side with the Conservatives.  After all, that would be like a contradiction in terms.  But hey ho and there you go, we now have a Conservative-Liberal Democrat coalition.

What Does all of this Mean?

Well, in essence, it means that the British people are stuck with a government they didn’t vote for.  Now, as an anarchist, I couldn’t really care less about the government because they are all a bunch of wankers anyway.  But Nick Clegg, now he really screwed us all over.  We are now stuck with a dude who made a number of promises, none of which were kept.  Let’s take a look at the lies he has told and then ask ourselves: should we have seen this coming?

The Lies Told by Nick Clegg

The first lie told by Cleggy is that he promised he would be different.  As difficult as it may be to define “different”, it seems clear that what he is doing now is no different from what other politicians have ever done.

The biggest lie, however, was that the Liberal Democrats had stated that they would not raise the tuition fees for students.  Surprise, surprise, they were trebled.  This is a huge one, for which Nick Clegg has now publically apologised.  Of course, he has made himself a laughing stock because it is too little too late.  His apology was immediately remixed into a fun song, which he then managed to personally ruining it by endorsing the song, so long as proceeds would go to a children’s charity.  What, is he trying to be cool now or something?

There are other lies too.  They promised that money for libraries and public services should be protected.  It hasn’t.  They promised that bus services would be subsidised.  They haven’t.   Then, there is the NHS – the National Health Service.  You may as well start looking at how Americans deal with their health services, because that is the way things are going to go over here.  The Liberal Democrats promised that front line staff would be in charge of the budget for their unit or ward.  This way, they would be completely involved in the services they provide.  That was a lie.  They also said that health boards would be able to commission in services from lots of different providers.  Yup, another lie.

Should We Have Seen this Coming?

I could go through the Lib Dem manifesto point by point and show how it was all a lie.  Before they came into power, nobody really listened to what they had to say.  They could promise that water would come out of our taps in liquid gold and nobody would batter an eyelid.  Why not?  Because they were never going to get into power.  But now they have.  Not real power, of course, Nick Clegg is but the lapdog of David Cameron, but they were put in a position where they were supposed to keep the promises they made us.  Oopsy…

But, were the promises just empty promises, made simply to get the right amount of voters to at least have a seat in parliament?  Or is dear old Nicky just an all-out liar?  Let’s take a look at the profile of a liar.


  • Liars don’t respond with any passion if they are accused of lying.  Tick for Nick Clegg.
  • Liars try to change the subject when confronted.  Tick for Nick Clegg.  Well, tick for any politician, since they never answer a question with a straight answer…
  • Liars have an expressionless face, or at least their expression doesn’t change.  Tick for Clegg.  Although it could be Botox, must ask him about that…
  • Liars have a closed posture and don’t like to make physical contact.  Tick for Cleggy again!  Although who knows what he gets up to when he’s alone with bum boy David Cameron of course!
  • Some liars hesitate when telling a lie.  Again, tick for Nick, unless he has a speech written out in front of him.

So yeah, we should have seen this coming.  Even before he joined the Conservative Party, Nick Clegg was really a shifty character, hiding behind the name of the Liberal Democrats as being left winged and socialists.  They’re not, of course, but on paper they were, at least more so than the Conservatives.  So, what’s going to happen now?  At the next elections, no one is ever going to vote for the Lib Dems again.  I wonder whether the party will just dismantle, becoming a part of the Conservatives altogether…

By the way, if you also want to tell Nicky and his cronies that you’re on to him, you can do so by commenting on his Facebook page.  I’ve been having a lot of fun with that one!

  1. […] Nick Clegg saying they wouldn’t raise tuition fees.  Big, fat, ugly, horrible lie.  But he’s apologised, so let’s cut the guy some slack.  The problem is, all of us lie.  If you would stand up right […]

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